Do you ever wonder about the paintings you don't see from your favorite artists? I do. I think it would be really fun to look through their dark corner of cast offs and see what they didn't like. I'd love to examine what they created and I wonder about WHY they didn't like it. I'm even more curious about what they've painted over. Can you imagine all the art that is under some of our favorite pieces? I'm not expecting masterpieces to be lazing around under there, but I bet it's more than we would think. There may be something of a story in our rejections. Maybe even a pattern.
As my painting practice grows, so does my own pile of cast offs. I reject way more art than I keep and I don't think I'm alone. At first, I was a little embarrassed of my ugly pieces and didn't want anyone to see them. But one day I was watching an art video (I can't remember now what it was or I would share!) and the teacher was showing several techniques and creating a few different paintings. At the end, she said to make sure and keep practicing even if it didn't work out the first time. Then she panned over her workspace and there were a lot of half-finished paintings that looked like distorted versions of what she showed as the final outcome. I was really surprised and loved seeing all the evidence of her journey to the final piece.
It's not often that I see the practice that came before a final piece. I remember feeling so good after seeing that. I felt better looking at my own ugly pages and understanding that it really is part of the process for others too. I saw how beautiful her art was and I also saw that it didn't come out of her perfectly on the first try. I know teachers and artists are always saying to practice and not worry what it looks like, but hearing it isn't the same.
Besides in classes, I doubt it will ever become popular to post all of our rejected paintings, rejected journals, or practice pages. Which I'm glad! I don't want to share all of mine for sure. But I thought in this blog post I would share a painting that has been a bit of a struggle for me. I have painted over it several times and just happened to have taken pictures of most of the stages. I've never been happy with it and just kept on and on until, somehow, it ended up with a weird dramatic heart floating in the river. SIGH. Time to walk away and just start something new.
Keep practicing and feel safe knowing that if you have ugly art hiding in the corner... you're not alone!
~ Anna B.
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